Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk

By Bryan Golden - July 15, 2022

The age-old proverb, “Don’t cry over spilled milk” contains more wisdom than most people recognize. Although everyone has heard this saying, few apply it effectively to their lives. This deceptively simple adage has the power to alleviate a lot of stress and suffering.

Let’s look at this proverb’s literal meaning and then consider the wide-ranging practical applications. Suppose you knock a bottle of milk over in the sink and all the milk runs down the drain. What are your options? The milk is gone. No matter what you do, you will never get it back.

A do-over is not possible, you can’t go back in time. If the milk made a mess, you clean it up. You can learn to be more careful next time and not leave the bottle where it can be tipped over. In short, you can’t change the past, but you can influence the present and future.

As apparent as the above choices appear, they do not seem as obvious for life’s mishaps. Why do people agonize over what can’t be undone? No one likes to make mistakes. Although we all would like to have everything be perfect, it just doesn’t happen that way.

Everyone makes mistakes. Looking back, it’s easy to identify things we would do differently if we could only do them over. We get caught up crying over the past as if our remorse has the power to change what has already transpired.

As futile as this may be, the allure of doing so is irresistible to many. Every minute spent moaning over what you could have, should have, or would have done is lost from the present and gone forever.

But you have a choice when milk spills. You don’t have to cry over it. You can learn from your experience and move forward. In your life milk will spill. You can act to minimize the spills, but they will occur. Some of the most successful people have had the biggest spills.

It’s virtually impossible to live a spill free life. Spills will occur, so you may as well make the best out of each situation. Each spill is simply another lesson and opportunity to learn.

What should you do when milk spills? First prevent any more milk from spilling. Then clean up the mess. Next, identify what caused the spill so you can avoid repeating the same deleterious actions. Few things are more frustrating and disheartening than repeating the same mistakes.

Change is the key to avoiding the same mistakes. You must change the way you act and the way you think. Different results require different behavior. If you consistently blame others for your spills, you will never be able to deal with the root cause — you.

A person’s spill response contributes to their quality of life. One cannot attain peace of mind if they are consumed by guilt and remorse. Granted, some spills are bigger and messier than others, but life and time march forward. There are no do-overs, or time outs and you can’t sit on the sidelines.

Although some spills will occur, you do have the ability to reduce their frequency and severity. There are those spills that can’t be anticipated or prevented. But there are many more that can. You should try to anticipate future spills so you can take action to avoid or minimize them.

Do what you can to avert spills but don’t cry when they occur. Clean up the mess, pick yourself up, and keep moving forward. Learn from your experiences and you will be all the wiser.