Pee Dee Coalition hosts Clippers and Conversation

BENNETTSVILLE—The Pee Dee Coalition hosted a discussion about domestic violence with men at Bella Beauty Institute. The group partnered with Man 2 Man Fatherhood Initiative to discuss domestic violence from a male perspective. Students from AMI Kids were invited to get haircuts, which were donated by the Rev. James Smith and the Greater St. James Baptist Church, and talk about domestic violence as well as hear about ways to get help if they are in an abusive relationship.

According to Wendy Woods, PDC Marlboro County Services Coordinator, a lot of people don’t want to talk about domestic violence. “But it’s here in Marlboro County,” she said. “Today, we’re going to talk about men as it relates to domestic violence. A lot of times people think that we’re talking about them being perpetrators of domestic violence, but we know they can be victims as well. One in four women are victims of domestic violence and one in seven men are victims of domestic violence.”

Woods said at the Pee Dee Coalition, they see male victims seeking services as well. “We see those men where maybe they’ve been laughed at. But their story and their victimization is still the same. A lot of times, the men that we’ve dealt with, come to us because they may have more strength in the relationship; but they don’t want to resort to violence. A lot of those men, there’s no laughing when it comes to court because the judge issues that order of protection. It came to our realization that we need to talk to the men in our community.”

Woods said it was important to hear the thoughts of men in the community about domestic violence.

Inside the barbershop, Bennettsville Police Chief Kevin Miller, Assistant Chief Sammy Crosland, Marlboro County Sheriff Charles Lemon, Clio town councilmember Chris McArthur and Rev. Smith and Gregory Woods, Man2Man Fatherhood intervention specialist, were some of the men on hand to have frank conversations with the students in attendance about recognizing the signs of psychological abuse, physical abuse and how to walk away from unhealthy situations.

The event was a safe space for the men and boys to talk about the stigma that men have when they are victims of domestic violence. Gregory Woods said in many instances, men are taught to hide their emotions and “suck it up.”

Smith said when a man is a victim of domestic violence, oftentimes when that man’s friends find out about it, “they criticize him for not being a strong man and not taking things into his own hands.”

The ManKind Initiative reported that of domestic abuse cases recorded by police, 25 % were against men. Only 4.8% of victims of domestic abuse being supported by local domestic services are men according to SafeLives data.

Wendy Woods said, “It takes more of a man to get the help.”

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 97% of men who experienced rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner had only female perpetrators.

Lemon said pride sometimes stops male victims of domestic violence from seeking help.

Miller said domestic violence is polarizing between men and women. “The examples that parents set for their children is long lasting and you learn from your environment and you’re taught those things. You see that and you think that’s okay and it’s not,” he said.