From the ages of 9 to 18 I played girls’ soccer for what I personally feel is one of the best athletic associations around: Indian Trail Athletic Association in Union Co., NC at good old Edna Love Park.
Because our record speaks for itself, I know I also had one of the best coaches in Ken Silvestri.
I have always enjoyed sports, but once I settled on soccer, I never looked back. An odd fact considering how much I hate running and exercising in general.
While playing soccer I learned a lot of valuable lessons- teamwork, etc., but one lesson, one “incident” as it were, will always stick out in my memory.
My lot in life has always been to be everyone’s peacekeeper, so it is not often when it is I who need the intervention.
Picture it: Soccer practice held on a dark, rainy, mildly cold evening and me not at all happy to be there.
To be fair there were a lot of internal reasons why I did not want to be at soccer practice this particular evening, but the one I chose to complain loudly about most was the mud.
Why? Because it was muddy and I wanted to complain. Yep, that was the reason.
Also, I think it is important to mention this was another one of our practices where we spent the bulk of it running laps and I am just a whiner anyway, okay?
One of my teammates turned to me and essentially told me to “Shut up.”
She explained to me, a little harshly, that we were all dealing with things and I didn’t need to be taking my bad mood out on everyone.
Now, I was not the only one complaining, but I had been going through a lot of heavy emotional things personally at this time, so I had to stop for a second and listen.
Because… she was right.
It wasn’t really about my whining over the mud and we both knew it — it was because I had not been myself in a while.
No, I had been being, let’s say, a “grump.”
I think about this moment often — not just because of her audacity, but because what she said was true on so many levels and I needed to hear it.
That was the night I pulled myself up by my muddy soccer kleets and started learning to get over myself.
I decided the things I was going through were not going to control me or change who I was. Often in life it is too easy to give in to letting our emotions rule, but when we do, all we end up with is mud.
Thick, goopy, messy, chaotic, emotional mud that glops all over everything and everyone.
This core memory is a constant reminder to not stay in my own head focusing on only myself and how I am feeling. It reminds me that I am truly at my best when my attention is on encouraging others while always keeping that peace.
As a wise girl once told me, be kind as you move through this life, keep your mud to yourself and… shut up!